Well-behaved women rarely make history.—Laurel Ulrich
Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.—Johnny Carson
I love swear words. Swear words are amazingly fun toys to play with, to throw around and bounce off people like verbal Nerf balls. They are the litmus test of how you’re going to get along with someone.
When you meet someone who prefers darn, shoot, gosh, and heck–well, if you’re like me, you run the other way. But if you are one of those people and want to add something sharp and shiny to your arsenal…
LTFS = Learn To Fucking Swear. Get on the profanity groove train with the example of the fabulous Lux Alani in The Little Vanilla Book:
I love ballistic verse and juicy metaphor; and fucking hell I love expletives. Everyone knows that dropping the F-bombs brings a point home like no other.
Why, you ask, Gentle Reader? How does the use of (usually) four-letter words end world hunger or bring spontaneous enlightenment? News flash—it won’t do either, but what it will do is help you loosen some of the Puritanical uptightness that may be directly related to doing what you’re told and never rocking the boat in “polite society.”
I’ve built a career on being a language expert, and I love learning the etymology of words. Teenagers may giggle when they start using swear words, and there are plenty of travel books that teach you how to swear in the language of a different country—all great, but this is fun and games. Go archaeologist on the words; find out where they come from, how they were created, what they meant originally versus how they are used today. When it comes to innovation, few things rival the human capacity for variety in expressing heightened feelings! Remember what George Carlin did in exposing (even venerating) the Seven Words You Can’t Say on TV? Like the rest of us linguaphiles, Carlin was an ardent explorer of the depth and breadth of language, especially when merrily tossing high-leverage words in our faces.
Humanity’s greatest invention, it can be argued, is language, and language is a tool like none other. It can alternately sooth and incense. You may already be a pro at using all the acceptable words, the language that is appropriate for most everyday situations. That’s great, and it’s useful for maintaining a civil society. I’m not advocating turning every conversation into a festival of so-called dirty words. I am advocating a deeper scrutiny of what YOU consider profane and why it has been labeled “profane” or “dirty.” Who gave it that reputation and to what end? Is something—a word, something having to do with sexuality, or even an entire belief system—“sacred” or “profane” to you simply because that’s what you’ve been taught to think?
If you’ve been taught that the word fuck (synonymous with sexual intercourse) is horrifying and could never utter it in a million years, then how do you feel about sexuality in general? Is that horrifying too?
The words you use are part of the self-defined life. You get to pick the words that express the REAL you, not the “you” that is fake or fearful. Sacred or profane, beautiful or ugly, happy or sad, polite or LTFS—it’s YOUR choice.
Lori Stephens, pNLP, CCP is a writer, editor, publisher, Certified NLP Practitioner, Whole Person Life Coach, and the founder of ROAR Life Coaching. She specializes in Exit Strategy Coaching—helping people who are ready to quit a soul-crushing job, walk away from a toxic relationship, exit a repressive social or religious group, come out as their true sexual or gender orientation, or in some other way claim their true path. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.